Author: Elisa Uhrynowski

All my life I’ve struggled to manage my time effectively. It is a huge challenge for me being organized and planning things. I haven’t been able to find that sweet spot of where I can actually feel in control and have the confidence to know I am doing a good job. Instead, I get home and do the necessities ( like feed the family), then I am wiped.

My previous post was about finding balance with an ADHD brain. I haven’t found it yet and I really hope that I get into a groove and I can say that I am an effective planner; that I’m able to manage my time and balance both work and life at home.

It’s been a frustrating several months because I know I am capable of so much more. When I was focusing on my own mental and physical health earlier this year, there was a sense of purpose and even peace that almost disappeared.

I’m not saying that I’m a very unhappy person right now but I am definitely frustrated in how I handle day-to-day situations. My temper is short, my emotions are strong and all I can think about doing now is working and getting home to crash on the couch at the end of the day.

Thankfully , there is a positive outcome to all this. About two months ago, I started picking up my pencil and sketch book and paints and started doing more creative things again. During my self awareness journey, I have learned that tapping into the creative side of my brain is very healing and a way to relieve stress. During Covid, I had lots of time to be creative and rediscover talents I didn’t realize I had.

However, ever since my work hours changed in late spring 2021, I find that I don’t have as much desire or energy to draw or paint or even go for a walk and take pictures. I am a working parent whose main responsibilities is to the family. I know we all have to take care of ourselves, but when other needs are prevalent, it is very easy to push aside our own personal needs for others. Add depression, anxiety and ADHD to the mix and priorities are scrambled.

Up until very recently, I didn’t think I would ever get out of my darkness. It just seemed this was my new normal. I knew I had done so much work last year to put myself first and take care of my mental well-being. Then, my life shifted quite abruptly that I couldn’t make heads or tails of anything. Whatever I experienced in the last few months just seemed to be so much harder than I could ever handle. I honestly thought I was doomed to live a perpetual life of misery. I’d tell myself this is the new me and I just have to deal with it. That’s the depression talking.

When I outline all the challenges I live with, I wonder how I get through the day. Mental illness aside, I deal with a lot. And when I feel overwhelmed, I shut down. I basically give up and do nothing. Then later, things pile up, and my responsibilities increase. It’s a terrible cycle to be in because if things don’t get addressed, then they get worse. This is a huge piece of ADHD that affects so many adults. From the outside, it may look like I am lazy and disorganized. In reality, I am stuck. I cannot make decisions, start or finish tasks because I don’t know how to begin and eventually, I get upset.

Emotions are high with those who have ADHD. I am more aware how much my emotions are affected by my inability to process information or situations. Frustration is a result. Anger kicks in. Then, I explode. Another vicious cycle that is hard to get manage. And I am medicated! I can’t imagine how I would be without meds.

It helps to have a supportive family who understands the conditions of ADHD, too. If someone understands how your brain works, then they can be more supportive, loving, patient and even helpful. At least that is my philosophy. I am super sensitive to those that are judgemental. I become very defensive and emotional if I feel I am being attacked. I know now this can be an opportunity to educate. Understanding leads to empathy with little room for judgement.

How can I continue to improve and establish a balance in my life? Now that I’m in a better place mentally, I can think clearer and come up with some ideas:

1. Slow Down – nothing good really comes from rushing around. It just makes you stressed and upset.
2. Ask for help – there is no shame in asking others to help you. We aren’t superheroes!
3. Be grateful for what you have – wishing for things or situations to be different just fuels the frustration. Maybe you don’t have a pristine house, but you do have a place to call home.
4. Stop expectations – hoping for people to do something you want isn’t going to help. When we let go of expectations, we can achieve peace of mind because there won’t be disappointment.
5. Believe in yourself – self doubt is destructive and can paralyze you. Take a moment each day and find something that makes you proud.

I am not saying these tips will be the solution to a life of happiness. As with anything, it takes work. We have to be active participants in our own lives.

The world is always changing and if we don’t take time to re-evaluate ourselves to adapt and improve, we will be stuck. In essence, we are all works in progress!

I consider myself a creative person. I love anything to do with the arts; drawing, painting, photography, writing, the theater and music. I honestly cannot think of anything I don’t like about the arts! I am not talented in music or theater, but I do appreciate it. Participating in various artistic and creative forms gets my mind working in different ways and it also serves as a great escape!

I can take a walk and find something that catches my eye and I’ll stop and take a picture. And not just any picture. I make sure I like the composition, I place my focus where I want and adjust the settings as necessary until I get the photo. When I draw or paint, it reminds me of childhood. I also enjoy the challenge of learning new techniques. And of course writing is something I enjoy as well. It enables me to share what’s on my mind while being creative.

Statistics have shown how important it is to involve children in the arts. Some well known benefits are problem solving, a gain in confidence, collaboration/teamwork and improvement in focus. There are other advantages that may not be as obvious, but may actually be even more important than mentioned above.

I believe our school system does try to incorporate that part of education just as well as other academic classes. It’s part of the Core Curriculum. Yet, there seems to be a lack of support when it comes to certain aspects of the arts. Even within the state, there are big disparities among school districts. We certainly can improve.

Many parents who want to get their children more involved in the arts usually have to go outside the school system because there just isn’t enough. There are many statistics out there showing how parents support the arts in education. One blog I found, americansforthearts.org conducted a survey in 2015 and found that at least 88% of parents believe the arts to be an important part of a well rounded education. Overall, a majority of parents (some as high as 93%) that have been surveyed in studies state they would like to see more arts in education. Another survey done around 2019 broke down the statistics even further.

Music seems to be on the decline, especially in my area. Parents aren’t sending their kids for lessons as much as they did in the past. The focus seems to be on sports or other activities. High School bands are smaller and the amount of school bands competing has also diminished. In my city, we are currently recruiting students from 6th grade and up to participate in the Color Guard for high school. It makes me sad to see that there aren’t enough kids participating.

I have a friend who has a music lesson business that is not flourishing as it was about a decade ago. He has told me that the music culture has changed and kids just find different ways of enjoying it. They don’t necessarily take lessons to play an instrument. Technology and social media apps like Tik Tok have changed how kids consume music. So, he is reinventing how he conducts his business with the hopes he can continue to offer quality instruction to students for years to come.

I sat down with Hannah Perry, owner of The Gigging Pig to get her perspective on the arts education.

Interview with Hannah Perry, June 2, 2021

How did art play a role in your success as an entrepreneur?

It was everything. I was raised by parents who encouraged me and my siblings to explore. We visited museums, the theater. It was part of my life. I never questioned whether or not I could do something that I enjoyed. In fact, there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I would be an artist. I am very fortunate to have had the arts as part of my upbringing.

Aside from some of the most common arguments for fostering the arts, what are some other less known benefits to arts education?

Unlike sciences and mathematics, the arts enable children to express themselves in non-verbal ways, which in turn, helps to build their self-esteem. The collaboration involved is much more about combining each other’s talents to form a unified project, whether it is a dance performance, a musical concert or theater, being part of the arts allows children to express and discover. In the process, they learn how to be considerate of others. Additional benefits are learning how to cope with emotions, problem solving and decision making, as well as improve vocabulary.

What can our education system do to improve exposure to the arts?

It can be better. For example, we (The Giggling Pig) are invited each year to a local school in a neighboring town for a “Day in the Arts.” It is interactive, as well. We provide art lessons and it is a wonderful day of celebrating.

Not only should all the arts be part of our educational curriculum, but it should start at a young age. I believe it is just as important, if not more than other aspects because in the arts, children are free to express themselves without judgement. In essence, participating in the arts enables children to the best they can be and have the confidence to pursue other things as well.

How can local businesses assist the schools in support of arts education.

I always participate in Junior Achievement and teach entrepreneurship to the students in the high school. That is certainly one way businesses can support the schools.

If money/funding wasn’t an issue, what would you love to see in our public schools regarding the arts that isn’t already being done?

I would love to see our entire community showcase the arts in a way that families can participate. Remember when Stamford had the different cows throughout the city? Perhaps we can do something similar and conduct a scavenger hunt of sorts where they explore our community and get prizes for completing the “hunt”. I would love to see our children have endless opportunities to participate in all kinds of arts programs.

How can parents help children be more involved in the arts?

It doesn’t have to monetary. In fact, start at home by just talking about it. Visit museums often. Go to concerts. Parents can even go online and find many opportunities to learn art or music via several free websites like YouTube. The key is to start when they are very young and continue throughout their years at home.

You mentioned your business, The Giggling Pig. Tell us more about your mission.

We aren’t just an art studio. Our values and mission is to teach children kindness, compassion and empathy. We do this indirectly through the art lessons and camps we run. The books I have written are all about these values.

In my opinion, we expect kids to understand these attributes without giving them the tools. By allowing kids to be creative in a safe and fun environment, children learn not only art, but about friendship, too. I have observed kids, who have been coming to our studios for years, enjoy being with one another, without any predisposed notions. They accept each other and become good friends. It’s a beautiful thing.

What does success look like to you?

As artists we appreciate nature. And I think one of the reasons nature is so powerful and can teach us so much, is that no one questions its beauty. No one asks the trees why they grow at different rates, why ones taller than the other. Why this flower bloomed before that one. We appreciate it for all that it is. And I think people should be more like that.

That to me is success. Giving children the confidence and the love they need to bloom how they want and when they are ready.

Do you foresee a positive future for arts educaiton?What does success look like to you?

Thank you very much, Hannah, for taking the time to discuss your viewpoints and why it is so important to focus on the arts in our education for our children.

After listening to Hannah speak about the arts and how important she believes it needs to be part of our everyday lives, I started to think that any kind of education starts in the home. As parents, we are our children’s first teachers. If we make the arts part of our environment at home, then kids will most likely want to have more of it at school. I strongly believe we need to make it a priority and not only bring in special guests/performances, etc. for a few hours, but interweave throughout the day on a consistent basis.

Art and Music is everywhere. And in all kinds of forms. There are so many benefits to the arts. Making it as part of our everyday lives makes us well-rounded people. It helps open up communication. It is fun. It is an escape. It is healing. Imagine making the arts the forefront of our education as our children grow up. The outcomes of possibilities are endless!

“Everything really is art, and we should cherish all its forms or we will certainly lose a closer connection to ourselves as human beings.” -Clori Rose

The Lambert Post

For more information about The Giggling Pig, please visit their website www.thegigglingpig.com. All research for this blogpost is from personal discussions and internet research. Hyperlinks to the statistics are embedded within the post.

The following post popped up in my Facebook memories. I suppose this was the beginning of my writings for my blog, which I originally published in August 2020. The sentiments I share still hold strong.

I will add that as a society, if we are not intentional in our actions and words, we are doomed to succeed in humanity. As we take time this weekend to honor those who fought for our country, I pray we will stand united and not just use this time for barbecues.

I have a lot on my mind lately, as I am sure many of you do. This world pandemic has affected all of us in ways that we cannot fathom in modern day history. Humankind has been through many trials and tribulations since we came into this earth, but this, being my lifetime, my world now, with my family, is something I believe is so unprecedented.

In a world full of instant communication and sharing of information, we can take what we see or learn and make choices. We have seen many positive actions taken, like thanking our healthcare workers, our educators and all the other “do-gooders” out there just trying to get through another day of social isolation and/distancing.

As humans, we are social in nature. Being cooped long can take a toll on anyone, especially for those with mental illness or other struggles they live with everyday. Technology has been our best friend throughout this, because we have been able to “see each other” via Zoom, Skype, FaceTime, or any other video/audio program. It has enabled us to remain connected, even if we cannot be there for one another in person.

However, it is not in our nature to remain isolated too long and we can see that everyone around the country and world are trying to get back to a new “normal”. But how can we really do so without the constant fear in the back of our minds of a resurgence? It’s all so confusing and frustrating because we yearn for companionship, socializing and just being with others. It’s Human Nature. I also strongly believe that those with mental illness are extremely vulnerable and we need to take care of them the best we can.

What baffles me the most that the events that have taken place in the last week are completely atrocious and makes me sad for our society. I feel angry, but I mostly feel disappointed that despite all the good cheer we have been sharing with everyone, we are falling apart or going backwards with violence, riots, downright rudeness and disregard for one another.

One of my teens is pretty insightful and the tragedy of George Floyd’s death and now Operation Pridefall (it’s an anti-LGBTQ+ propaganda campaign) coming up in June is making him question what is wrong with our world? I try to offer words of wisdom, support and an open ear. How do I tell my kid that “this too, shall pass” when our history shows when one tragedy ends, another comes along at some point and that we need to remain steadfast and strong and hold our heads up high and ignore the haters?

All that comes to mind is that we can voice ourselves against the wrong in a peaceful way and not choose violent or threatening acts to get our points across. We must remember those who fought for Civil Rights and did it in an inspirational way, not buy killing or spitting or looting, but by prayer, positive and powerful words and peaceful actions.

Who were some of those that fought against the hatred and prevailed or at least inspired a movement? Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Teresa to name a few. But there are several others who sacrificed themselves to the point of imprisonment and even death to spread the words of Love and Peace. Even if you don’t believe, we can look at our biblical history and see how followers of Jesus stood up for what they believed and died for it, too.

Personally, I am not that strong of a person. But I do have a voice that I can express here because of our forefathers of the United States without being persecuted. And for that, I am grateful.

I told a group I belong to that I had an urge to get out on a soapbox and speak my mind about how we need to continue doing good for others and to let go of our old ways of violent protests. Would anyone listen? I pray for the families who have suffered and died due to this pandemic. I pray for those with mental illness. I pray for all those have lost their lives unduly or unjustly. I pray for our leaders, our educators, and law enforcement. I pray our children. Most of all, I pray for humanity. If anything this pandemic has taught us is that WE ARE HUMAN and WE ARE GOOD. We can choose the path of Light or live in the dark side. I will always choose LOVE and EMPATHY for people because what are we without that?

But I will not only pray, but take action in a way I know I can make an impact. Perhaps it’s by helping others? Maybe sending a care package to someone who needs their spirits lifted? All I know is that I will never stop caring for people and will speak out against those who place judgement on others in a peaceful and thoughtful way. I leave you a couple quotes from Martin Luther King, Jr.:

“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Letter from Birmingham Jail, April 16, 1963

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Strength to Love, 1963

Last week was probably my worst week so far. I did not feel well physically or emotionally. I have lower back pain due to a combination of a bad hip and arthritis. Despite the constant pain, I push through and do what I can. However, the pain was pretty bad and I didn’t workout but maybe two times. Emotionally, I was sad and frustrated. I felt that everything I was doing was not getting me anywhere because the weight is not coming off as much as I thought it would.

Not only was I upset over the weight, I had other things happening that affected my feelings. I couldn’t shake the feeling of sadness and being down most of the week. I lost my drive.

When Saturday afternoon rolled around, I was finally feeling more like myself and started reflecting on the week. Yes, it was a difficult week. Yes, I was in pain. Yes, I was sad for multiple reasons. Why wasn’t I cutting myself some slack? After all, not every week is going to be fantastic.

So what if I didn’t get in all my workouts? It’s not the worst thing that could have happened. I suppose I felt betrayed by my own body. I was discouraged I couldn’t do what I have been doing for the past several weeks.

It was challenging to get out of my own head and give myself grace to just be ok with the situation. I am grateful for my support and accountability group. I knew if I told them what was happening, they would help me. I wasn’t wrong. They gave me tips and tools on how to get out of my funk. They also emphasized that I need to be gentle with myself. I found I was receving the advice I normally give to others!

It is completely ok to take a break, as long as that break doesn’t last too long. I compare it to a parking space. I can park in it but I can’t stay in it forever.

Eventually I have to move.