Category: nature

Solar-Powered Spirit: The Connection Between the Sun and My Faith

“For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.” –Psalm 84:11

For thousands of years, many cultures have seen the sun as a god or a higher power. It’s not surprising because the sun was mysterious. It would appear and reappear each day, providing light and warmth. Across the world, people honored and worshipped the sun because it represented life and power. Some would even go so far as to make sacrifices to ensure the sun would rise each day.

Sounds a little out there, doesn’t it? Imagine living without the sun, where the days are consistently dark and cold. Picture when the ancients experienced a solar eclipse for the first time. They probably were frightened. Their sole source of energy and life just disappeared. It only makes sense how cultures defined their beliefs in the sun and its power.

Time to Observe

Back in the Covid days, I tapped into my artistic side and started drawing, painting and even dabbled in some photography. For some reason, I would wake up super early each day before the sun rose. I’m not quite sure how I came to the decision to start watching sunrises, but that’s what I did, almost every day. At first I drove to a neighborhood where I thought would be the best view to take pictures of the sunrise. Later, I decided to drive to the beach. I would take walks on the boardwalk and watch as the sun peeked above the horizon. I was so taken by the beauty of the sun rising in the early morning hours. It became a standard routine to wake up early, grab my camera and then drive the 25 minutes to the beach for my sunrise walk.

I loved watching and listening to the birds sing. I observed how the water moved along the shore. I appreciated all the little things that most of us probably overlooked on a regular basis. It was a time for me to admire, reflect and be present.

taken May 2021, Milford CT

S.A.D

I was talking to friends at church about how I believe I have S.A.D., otherwise known as Seasonal Affective Disorder. In a somewhat jest full way, one of my friends pointed out that we are solar-powered. I never realized how much the sun affected me. It’s not just the fact that it makes the day bright and warm, but it energizes me like nothing else. My mood changes immediately when the sun comes out and shows its happy face. On the other hand, if it’s hidden, and clouds are taking over, I am grumpy and irritable. The other day, it was a really cold, windy, and rainy day…not to mention it was Monday. When I arrived at work to start my day, I found that my mood was pretty lousy and it only got worse as the day progressed. I couldn’t shake it. At the end of the day, I went home and put on my pjs and crashed on my bed. I wanted the day to be over! Funny thing is that the following day, the sun was out in its glory, and so was my happy-go-lucky self!

The sun has the ability to bring out the best in me. I smile more and I feel lighter in my spirit. It has occurred to me there is a correlation to the sun and God. When He isn’t present, our days are dreary and our moods are gloomy. But when He is front and center, we feel lifted and energized. We know we can accomplish anything because He is by our side. Like the sun gives us warmth and nurturing, God provides us with the truth of His word to get us through the day.

Nature’s Alarm Clock

On my many walks on the beach, I noticed how nature would stir and wake up as the sun would rise. From the gentle songs the birds sing, to the rolling waves of water kissing the sand on the shore, the sun is nature’s alarm clock to say it’s time to start the new day! Life cannot exist without the sun. And so it is with God. He is our life force…our alarm clock. He reminds us each day, if we pay attention, we are loved. He helps us by providing comfort and stability. And just as the sun provides light to our world, so does God, who gives us light and steers us away from darkness.

Yes. I am solar-powered, but by the son, the father and the holy spirit. My positive energy comes from my faith and love of nature, the precious gifts that God has provided me.

These are just a few pictures I took during my time watching sunrises during the Covid pandemic. Each time I visited, I found something new to appreciate.

Tell me in the comments how the sun energizes you and how your faith plays a role in your day.

Road Blocks, Rocks and Rivers

They say when faced with many challenges, the ones that prevail come out stronger. I am not so sure how much stronger I can be. At this point, I should be Ms. Universe of Strength, if that’s a thing!

Back in February, I mentioned about changes in my job situation and that I should embrace those changes with a positive attitude. Unfortunately, it just didn’t work out. The new owners of the practice made drastic changes that left me feeling frustrated and upset most of the time. After careful thought, I decided to leave the job in early April. I gave a 2-week notice, but was asked to leave a mere 2 days later. It wasn’t the parting I wanted and I left feeling a bit humiliated, disheartened, yet relieved. Without getting into details, it was the right decision.

It has been only about a month and a half, but it feels like a very long time since I’ve been out of work. At first, I figured I’d give myself the time to grieve, re-evaluate, and decide what my next steps would be career-wise. In addition, I was preparing to have surgery for my hip the end of April, so the timing was actually ok.

Then I encountered another road block – my surgery was canceled. The reason? I had gained 30 pounds since my consultation (less than a year prior) and the doctor would not perform the surgery.

Needless to say I was devastated. I knew I had gained some weight, but the amount I gained was astonishing. I was so angry at myself for allowing this to happen. I walked out of the office building and hurled my handbag towards the car in a rage. WTF??? How could this be?? How could I allow myself to get to this point? I have been in a lot of pain and it has only gotten worse. I am unable to sustain long periods of standing and walking is difficult. The arthritis that has caused the deterioration in my hip is pretty bad. I need the surgery!!!

Did anyone say WAKE UP CALL? I won’t say I’m completely depressed because I keep trying every day to make good choices. Yet, I am not super happy with how things are progressing, either. Ever since I received the news about the surgery, I have changed my eating habits. There are so many combination of things I have to think about to ensure I make right choices each time. I’ve spent hours looking online looking for healthy recipes that I think will work for me. So far, I’ve been doing this on my own, with no outside support from sources like professional weight loss programs.

The weight is not coming off fast enough for me. It’s a slow progress. I have probably lost about 4 pounds total in a month. Some would say that’s great. But for me, it’s not good enough. The physical limitations are affecting me even more. Now that the weather is nice, I could go outside and walk, but right now, it’s nearly impossible without pain. The most I can do is probably just do an upper body workout, which I have just come to realize will be my only way out of this dread of feeling physically useless.

And if not to add more salt to my open wounds, I am also managing my parental duties to my kids, especially my younger son, who has struggled with anxiety and depression most of his adolescent life. I spend a lot of time taking care of his needs. I don’t want to disclose too much here, but he is battling things I am not familiar with and so I leave it to the professionals to help him. I’m just there for him to love and support him as much as possible. It’s not easy because as a parent, I feel helpless. Thank goodness, though, I have found good providers.

My older son is a junior in high school and I’ve been trying to guide him, along with a tutor, to prepare for life after high school. He wants to go to college and study physical therapy or something in the health sciences. However, he has his own challenges with grades and extracurricular activities that colleges look for when considering a student for admission. As a mom, I worry about his future and that brings a whole different set of frustrations to the mix. Additionally, there are other things like elderly parents to worry about, my 20+ year marriage to maintain and just working on keeping my mind sane! HA!!

All of these road blocks/obstacles, are certainly difficult and could potentially be paralyzing. Every day I wake up hoping for something to change. But change doesn’t just happen on its own. We have to pave our pathways around those road blocks to find a new road to travel. Sure, what is ahead of us is unknown and can be very scary. But if we don’t make our own way, we’re stuck behind that obstacle holding us back.

My therapist told me of this metaphor in nature about a rock in a river…the water makes its way around it to continue moving forward. The water doesn’t stop flowing just because it ran into a rock. And it certainly doesn’t go backwards, either.

Neither should we. No matter how many obstructions get in our way, we have to keep moving or else we are stuck in our own misery. I don’t want to be stuck. I want to keep moving. I want to find my clear path of success…even if it will take longer than I hope.

As a famous musician once wrote and sang,

We all end in the ocean
We all start in the streams
We’re all carried along
By the river of dreams

-Billy Joel